Is The Grass Always Greener On The Other Side
Have you ever seen a cow or a horse practically tear down a fence to reach some green grass on the other side, even though the grass within the confines of the fence in which the horse or cow is located is equally green and lush? I have seen them strain and stretch through barbed-wire, oblivious to the pain that they were bringing upon themselves, even to the point of cutting themselves and mangling the fence, just to get at the grass on the other side. If cows or horses could talk (Mr. Ed notwithstanding), would they tell us that it was worth all of the effort, the destruction, and the pain to find out that what is on the other side of the fence is equal to, or even less desirable than, the grass that they were already enjoying inside the fence? I believe we would find the answer to be a resounding “no!” Why is it that we as humans sometimes exhibit an intelligence no greater than the animals when it comes to our view of life on the other side of the fence?
How many homes, reputations, lives, and souls have been destroyed because of man’s tendency to think that life is better for the other person? Envy and jealousy have been the downfall of many. Eliphaz reminds us, “For wrath killeth the foolish man, and envy slayeth the silly one” (Job 5:2). Envy is said to be the “rottenness of the bones” (Prov.14:30). The wise man Solomon puts envy in perspective: “Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous; but who is able to stand before envy?” (Prov.27:4). Jealousy is said to be “cruel as the grave” (Song of Solomon 8:6). The Old Testament even had provisions for dealing with jealousy (Num.5:14-15). Knowing the havoc that these two emotions can wreak, we should rid our lives of them. Why is it then that we often allow these emotions to cloud our vision, believing that the lives others lead is far more joyous and fulfilling than our own? How many who experience marital problems look at others and think that their marriages are better, or that they don’t face the same problems, etc.? How many see the houses, cars, possessions, of their neighbors and think to themselves that their own life pales in comparison to the successfulness of those around them? Those who give place to envy and jealousy may very well find themselves destroying Divine boundaries around marriage and the home, ignorant of, or ignoring, the pain that they are bringing upon themselves and their families (financial ruin, broken trust, tarnished reputations, divorce, etc.). What many fail to realize far too late is that the problems on the other side of the fence are very similar to, or worse than, the problems they were dealing with within their own homes.
How many congregations have been devastated in much the same way as described above? Preachers and members are sometimes guilty of becoming frustrated with the problems that inevitably arise within the local congregation. Instead of dealing with these problems, many begin looking at other congregations and thinking that they don’t have any problems, or the problems that they face are not as serious or discouraging as what is faced in the home congregation. Many hop from congregation to congregation, only to uncover problems they never knew existed, or to find that the problems were worse than they had been led to believe. I very much appreciate the advice of a wise preacher I worked with, whom I greatly admire. He told me, “I would rather work with a congregation where I was familiar with their problems, than to go to a new congregation and have to learn all their problems.” I believe what he was telling me as a young preacher is that “the grass is not always greener on the other side.”
-Patrick Morrison
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